Kissing Lessons for Thieves and Pirates
by vieralynn
Summary: Al-Cid toyed with an empty bottle of Bhujerban Madhu... and it starts a series of telling good-night kisses. Al-Cid, Ashe, Balthier, Fran, Elza, Rikkan, Vaan, Penelo, Basch. Al-Cid/Balthier, Vaan/Balthier, and other kiss-pairings. For LJ kissing battle.


_Kissing Battle request for Balthier/Vaan and Balthier/Al-Cid, together all in one story, with lots of other kisses in this story too._

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**Kissing Lessons for Thieves and Pirates**

Al-Cid toyed with an empty bottle of Bhujerban Madhu, an identical kin to well over a dozen other bottles around the room that each contained various amounts of the honey gold liquid, although more than a few were only filled with air. Elza had brought a case out of storage and despite the circumstances—the recent death of Reddas and the trials all would face in the coming days—everyone in the room had been surprisingly jovial throughout the evening, no doubt helped by the food and the madhu they had consumed.

Nine of them sat around the table: Ashe and her companions, Elza and Rikken, and himself. Not once during the evening had anyone spoken of war or loss or strife, but instead only of the fond memories they each held and of the things they enjoyed. Al-Cid had spoke little throughout the evening and mostly observed.

He had wished to speak further with the Lady Ashe about matters of diplomacy, yet this evening had not presented the opportunity despite the fact that she sat immediately to his left. Instead, Ashe had spent most of the time in fanciful chatter with Balthier about his life as a pirate, and as the warming effects of the madhu grew stronger within them, Al-Cid could not help noticing how every sentence the sky pirate spoke to Ashe was punctuated with a look that is a prelude to a kiss. Before the evening was done, he at least wanted to speak with Balthier in private. He had something he wanted to ask him.

"No matter what," Elza said as she leaned forward and held her bottle up toward the center of the table, "we pirates will always remain young at heart and soar freely through the sky."

One by one, bottles were raised in the air, resolutely by the actual pirates at the table, with surprising vigor by the princess, and with camaraderie by the captain. Admittedly, the young woman, Penelo, looked as if taking the last swig from her bottle would finish her.

"Hey, you too!" Vaan thrust his chin toward Al-Cid. "Come on! Everybody's a pirate tonight. In honor of Reddas."

"Ah, yes, but it would seem," Al-Cid said as he ran his finger along the lip of his empty bottle, "that mine is, unfortunately, empty." He tipped the bottle onto its side. "Of course, I do not mean any disrespect." He didn't. He had already drunk to the man several times.

As arms reached and glass clicked and honey-fire contents drained into the mouths of the eight other people around the table, Al-Cid absentminded tipped his bottle to its side and began to slowly spin it on its side. It turned and turned as people drank and stopped shortly thereafter.

"Alright!" Vaan shouted. "Now you gotta kiss her!" Vaan pointed his bottle at Al-Cid before draining the last of its contents. "That's the rules."

It took no more than a moment for Al-Cid to realize what Vaan was referring to. The mouth of the bottle pointed directly at the Lady Ashe.

"Well, now." Still seated, Ashe pushed herself back from the table. She was clearly flustered, but nowhere near as bothered as Balthier, who sighed heavily as he shook his head and looked away. This was far from the first time that Al-Cid had seen such a reaction from the pirate.

"If I must." Al-Cid turned in his chair to face Ashe.

"Consider it a kiss goodnight." Her boldness, however crisp, was encouraging as she offered her hand.

Al-Cid took hold of her hand and moved as if to kiss it, but stopped short of letting his lips touch her skin. Instead, he gazed up at her and saw that she looked at him quizzically, and then he drew her hand to his chest as he moved forward until his lips nearly touched hers. She showed no signs of protest; only a vague obedience mixed with a hint of curiosity, and so he kissed her, slowly, but not for too long, tasting honey sweet and fire spice madhu on her moist, yeilding lips.

She slowly withdrew. "I shall retire for the night," she said quietly but with dignity, and she started to stand, although she was somewhat unsteadily, perhaps from the madhu.

"Hey, you still need to spin. It's your turn." Vaan reached across the table, vigorously waving his finger in the air in a drunken attempt to garner the princesses attention. If she considered his gesture rude, she did not comment. Instead, she leaned forward and spun the bottle, and it turned about in the center of the table with vigor.

Around it went, quickly passing Balthier, Fran, Elza, and Rikken in a flash, and just as quickly passing Vaan, Penelo, Basch and Al-Cid. It spun past where she stood and on again past Balthier, spinning around and past him again, but then it began to slow midway through its next revolution. Around it went again, slowing ever further, and Al-Cid noticed how Vaan's eyes hungered as the mouth of the bottle slowly slid past him but the bottle did not stop. Instead it continued slide forward past Penelo, whose head bobbed from side to side as she neared passing out, until it came to a slow halt pointing at Basch's elbow, which rested heavily upon the table. He made a small grunt of surprise as everyone looked at him, a few snickering, yet his mask of professionalism remained, which was, Al-Cid suspected, the most natural and most comfortable state for the man.

Ashe walked over to him as she left the table, offering him her hand. He took it and let his lips chastely brush against her finger tips as if she were a child, perhaps a very young sister or a niece. "I bid Her Highness a good night's sleep with pleasant dreams."

Al-Cid could not see her reaction, but she left the room without turning to look back.

"Well, Captain," said Balthier, "it seems you cheat at other parlor games just as much as you cheat at cards."

"I do not cheat." Basch leaned forward, resting his weight on both elbows. "I believe the rules only state that one must give a kiss, but they do not state how or where." He reached forward and spun the bottle with a quick flick of his wrist. "That is, as long as the how and where remain within the bounds of appropriate decorum."

Al-Cid heard the Viera softly snort.

After three revolutions, the bottle slowed and halted, pointing in the direction of the empty space just beyond the corner of the table to the right of Basch's arm.

"I wager that you do cheat." Balthier reached for his own bottle, which was less than one-fifth full.

"And you might lose a few more gil to me if you do." Basch leaned back in his chair with a smug yet jovial smile.

Then, head weaving back and forward, Penelo slumped to the table, her blond hair falling loose across her arm; her limp hand knocked the mouth of the bottle.

The captain's well maintained poker-face gave way to deeply genuine concern as he touched the young woman's arm. "I shall see her safely tucked into bed." He stood with only a slightly noticable wobble and began to lift Penelo to her feet while softly urging her to comply. She turned her head to look at him, heavy-lidded, resigned, yet it was apparent she fully trusted him.

"Remaining with the bounds of appropriate decorum, Captain?" Balthier raised his bottle and drank the final swig. "Or cheating again?"

"That was uncalled for." Basch hoisted Penelo into his arms and, to Al-Cid's surprise, managed to deftly handle both the effects of alcohol and girl's weight—albeit slight—as he nodded goodnight and left.

"I'll take over." Vaan slid forward, grabbed the bottle, and spun it as his gaze drifted slowly across Fran and Elza, yet the bottle did not make it that far, stopping short to point directly at Balthier. It took a moment for Vaan to realize where it had stopped and he gave a nervous laugh. "Well, I guess I did spin for Penelo, so she…"

"I suspect that gracing me with a kiss is the furthest thing on her mind right now."

"Uh, yeah, well, you could go and—"

"Or, you could come over here right now, unless you prefer to skirt the rules for sake of honor, like our dear captain is wont to do."

"Oh… well…" Vaan began to walk around the table, one foot unsteady after the other. "How 'bout I stop one chair early?" His hand lingered on the back of Fran's chair.

"I don't think so," Fran said as she turned and pushed Vaan another step forward toward Balthier.

"Oh, come now." Balthier stood and grasped Vaan by the wrist, pulling him a step closer. "Don't be such a prude. You might find that you'll learn something that will come in handy while, say, picking pockets or disarming someone of their dagger or gun, although you need not practice any of those other skills right now."

Al-Cid could clearly see the drunken haze in Vaan's eyes as Balthier pulled at Vaan's hand and pressed it firmly against Balthier's buttocks. Balthier's free hand cupped the back of Vaan's head as he pulled him into a seemingly impassioned kissed. The other pirates cheered as Balthier moved Vaan's hand to his holster and over various pockets, all the while kissing him with such heated passion that Vaan appeared limp in his arms.

"Now," Balthier said as he slowly released Vaan, "that was educational, was it?"

"Uh, yeah," Vaan slowly scratched his head and then rubbed his eyes. "I think its getting sort of late, so… uh, see you in the morning." Vaan left the room.

"Well, that's a first." Fran pushed back her chair. "Perhaps you were too rough on your apprentice."

"He's not my—" Balthier stopped and merely groaned and shook his head.

Elza slipped her arm around Rikken as they both stood. "I'm glad that all of you are here tonight. Reddas believed in you."

As the remaining people moved to leave the room, Al-Cid stood by his chair and reached for Balthier's arm as he walked by. "Wait, there is something I wish to speak with you about."

The sky pirate's eyes narrowed and he groaned with drunken frustration. "I never suspected that I was the one you wished to linger with as night slips toward early morning."

Al-Cid ignored what the pirate had said. "I have heard that you were once a judge in Archadia."

"I heard you were the playboy of House Margrace." Balthier stepped closer to him. His breath smelled strongly of madhu.

"There is something I would like to ask you, but perhaps," Al-Cid reconsidered, realizing that Balthier had clearly drunk more than he had remembered, "perhaps it is best to wait until tomorrow, although, I do not want either of us to forget."

"Forget what?" Balthier was now standing so close to him that it was hard to focus clearly on his eyes. The tip of the pirate's nose was less than a finger's width away from his own.

Al-Cid has miscalculated. This was clearly not the time to ask the pirate about a wild card that could be a potential ally. The close and heavy silence between them was making Al-Cid uncomfortable, but he would not do anything to let the pirate know. He stood his ground and waited.

Balthier lunged forward, placing his leg firmly between Al-Cid's and Al-Cid found himself pinned between the pirate and the hard back of a chair as Balthier thrust his mouth forward and kissed him fiercely, angrily, and his hands moved and searched and groped along the sides of Al-Cid's body. Then the pirate pulled back as abruptly as it has all begun.

Later, alone, when Al-Cid undressed, he found a small ring in his pocket that was not his. He remembered seeing it earlier on the little finger of Balthier's left hand. It looked like a lady's wedding band. The next morning Al-Cid found a discrete way to return it. He never found a chance to ask Balthier what he knew about a particular Archadian judge.


End file.
